Wednesday, November 5, 2008

I'm SO weird!!!

Ya, I can hear it now...."and you are just now figuring this out?" Yes, it's true, I am weird. I have spent the last 3 days fighting a migraine..."Imitrex let me down" Anyway, I needed those last three days to get this house clean.

I WANT a clean house! It's important to me, it makes me happy, it makes me calm, it is a must. So I left work early today....I'm not in the mood for health care right now. Thanks Don for listening to me whine about how busy I am and coming in to work for me! I owe you.

So, back to my story, I didn't do all the things I wanted to do this last three days because of the migraine battle. So today I left work at noon with the intent of cleaning this house....before it got mistaken for a "crack house". So what do I do???? Do I clean the kitchen? No. Do I clean the bathroom? No. Do I clean the living room? No. I clean the stupid refrigerator. Why? Please 'xplain that to me Lucy? Why do I clean the fridge when the whole world is in chaos? The fridge door closes and no one knows that it's dirty. To me, if the refrigerator is clean...the planets have aligned. All is right with the world...which is huge today considering the elections are over.

Can you believe I just posted a picture of my dirty fridge? That's disgusting. But if you really want to be disgusted, click on the picture so you can get an up-close shot. Really disgusting! So another question I have besides why would I clean the fridge when it's low on the totem pole. I want to know why there is cat hair in the bottom below the crisper! How does that happen? Are they dancing in the fridge? Are they opening the fridge and making a "sammich" and getting a mug of milk? What's with the cat hair? Ya, I'm sure you're all gagging about now.(I can see Becca running to her fridge now to check under the crisper!)

I needed my Zen. I needed a clean refrigerator.

And there's another thing.....why do I hate cleaning my oven? It's a self cleaning oven. I've had it for over 10 years. It's really self cleaning. I have only cleaned it 3 times in 10 years! Ya, I know, pass the zofran! I don't care that I have a disgusting oven. It really doesn't bother me.

Why does a dirty fridge and house send me over the edge and a dirty oven doesn't faze me in the least? (The only reason I'm cleaning it today is that my mother is coming this weekend.) I hate using the self cleaning thingy because I know it's costing me a fortune. I wish I would have gotten a me-cleaning oven instead. Since I was cleaning out the fridge I decided I would use the self cleaning oven too. The first time I used the self cleaning thingy I set off the smoke alarms in the house. Frightening really. Besides the electric meter whirring at mach 50 G force it makes the house stink. It smells hot. I hate that smell. Cameron did come up and ask what was for dinner though.

Note the little thingy on the display that says "self cln" ?

OK, I still haven't cleaned anything else and I have a lot to do before this day is over. So I need to get off this blog. But I was just hoping for some answers. Oh, gotta therapy session starts soon.

PS Update: So I am now NEARLY done with the house. I am starting to feel peace. NOW I have another question: Is it bad that the vacuum cleaner has a burnt rubber smell and there is smoke coming from the belt? I probably should have bought the right size belt last week, but that's what happens when Howie is out of town.

There is only 27:00 minutes left on my self cleaning oven time...I'll have to take out a loan to pay the electric bill but oh well. So my house smells like burnt oven cleaning and burnt vacuum belt. Anyone wanna come over for dinner?

I know you all have perfectly clean houses and fridges and you are shocked at how I live...filth and all. I'm sure I've lost a few friends, but hey, I'm just keepin' it real!
IMPORTANT UPDATE!!!! It's nearly 10:00 p.m. and I had to take a picture of the finished result.

Oooohhhhh Shiny!

Mom can come for a visit now!


Jeppesens said...

Okay I am cracking up reading your blog. I can smell that great smell of the self cleaning oven, and also the burnt up belt on the vaccuum. You are so funny. Also I can see rebecca frantically checking and cleaning out her fridge. I think it is so funny how each person has such different qwerks about them. Ps I hope your headaches get better :)

Mary Z said...

HHMMM? I wonder why you have a three day headache. By the way I went to the new massage therapist tonight at the office and she took my cares away.

Kirsten said...

OK, I am SO glad that I'm not the only insane person on earth that gets a high from having certain things really clean! Thanks Tauna! Besides the wonderful feeling of having a clean house, one of my little quirks is my vehicle. I had my van detailed last week and WOW! I felt so much relief! It was like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. Now I'm super strict about what the kids and Paul have in it! Ray's Chevron does a great job! Oh and by the way, thanks for the reminder about needing to self clean MY oven!

The Karrens said...

Will you come clean my house. I hate cleaning my fridge and really hate cleaning my oven. Hope you feel better!

Only Girl said...

Well dont feel bad Im the same way!! Just seeing your clean fridge and oven makes me feel a need. And Im sure Im gonna find dog hair so tell me how the heck that got in.

The Idaho Shaum's said...

Tauna you crack me up please come clean my fridge because it is like your oven is to you. I hate it dirty but I hate to clean it plus if I would just throw away all that food after the meal because I know for sure we are not going to eat it again, why do you think there is left overs!!!!

Nef Fam said...

My new goal: Be Weird like Tuna. :)

Conder's Castle said...

Mom, you are so crazy...really. I wonder where my neurosis comes from then I read you blog and I get it. So, after you finish with the cat hair, you can tackle a dog hair problem....that stuff is everywhere!

Dream Weaver Family said...

You don't need a massage therapist, you need a shrink therapist!! No wonder your head aches and no wonder mine was aching, it was for you who brings on such awful jobs to yourself. But, it does look beautiful!